A two-spirit journey : the autobiography of a lesbian Ojibwa-Cree elder by Chacaby Ma-Nee

Author:Chacaby, Ma-Nee
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: University of Manitoba Press
Published: 2016-05-02T16:00:00+00:00

FIGURE 8. IN MY WEDDING DRESS ON THE DAY I MARRIED NATE IN THUNDER BAY (TWENTY-NINE YEARS OLD, 1979).

CHAPTER EIGHT

WORKING WITH ADDICTED MOTHERS AND RAISING FOSTER KIDS WITH NATE IN WINNIPEG (1980–1987)

Sarah, Martin, and I arrived in Winnipeg in the fall of 1980. At that point the city had a population of about half a million, which was several times larger than Thunder Bay. Nate had rented a small apartment where we all lived at the beginning. Around the same time, my brother Andy moved to Winnipeg with his new girlfriend, Lori, so I was happy to have some family in the area. I enrolled Martin and Sarah, who were eleven and twelve years old, in a French school where they learned both English and French.

Over the following years, Sarah did well in school, and she was happy to participate in after-school activities like ballet. As a teenager, she volunteered as a candy striper at a hospital and was very proud of her work there. Martin continued to struggle in school, so Sarah and I helped him a lot at home. He was a visual learner. Martin understood when people explained things to him in simple English, but he still was not able to read and write. His teachers knew that he was slower than his classmates, but they felt it was good for him to be with kids of the same age, as long as he was learning at his own pace. If Martin were in the school system today, he probably would have been assessed as having a developmental delay and then received special educational services, but that wasn’t the practice in 1980.

Nate and I got in the habit of sharing household and work responsibilities. We both cooked and cleaned the house. We also did mechanical work together, like maintaining and fixing our radios and kitchen appliances. We often played board games or cards with the kids. Sometimes we went out for walks with them to explore the area. As the kids got to know their classmates, they started bringing friends home. I liked it when they were all in the apartment, because it was easier to keep track of what they were doing. Nate also was supportive when Sarah and Martin got sick. One time Sarah became very ill and I had to stay up taking care of her for twenty-four hours. The next night she was still sick and I was exhausted, so Nate watched over her instead. Another night when Martin was ill, Nate stayed up with him.

Not long after we arrived in Winnipeg, I found a larger apartment for us in a huge, block-long building on Portage Avenue. I made a deal with the landlord to do basic renovations and paint walls when tenants moved out of units. That was steady work for about six months, because there were always apartments in need of painting. When Martin wasn’t in school, he helped me. Once I explained to him how to do a task like that, he was very thorough and did a good job.

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